oooooo heaven is a place on earth

and it comes in two forms:
acai berry and heated blankets.

let's begin with yesterday morning. a power play led me to rush out of the house earlier than usual which, naturally, put me in a horrible mood.
no alarm = complete bliss. alarm = complete bit...well, you know.

arrive at work, grumpy and shinyfaced. now just imagine me glaring at the computer screen for three hours, in complete defiance of why my employer chooses to pay me. "oh you need what? when? check next week. thanksgiving is thursday so we're on hiatus. who's we? me and the mouse. holla."
a general rule is that if i can make it to twelve-thirty i can make it through the rest of the day, as a friend and i leave for lunch every.single.day. is this budget friendly? no. is it people friendly? yes!
i will now say that mi cocina's mico rico with chicken is the best "salad" in existence. i had to airquotes salad because it also about as healthy as nachos, but it's got lettuce in there! and if you get the salad, you've got to get the fire sauce, i.e. the chile garlic vinegarette. DAMN. lupita was raging when she put that one together because i felt the scald in my brain. and imagine my surprise when, after my sixth glass of iced tea, i look across the ice skating rink and see a flash of light. a gorgeous orange sunset in the middle of the mall? how could this be?

orange cup my friends. orange cup.
acai berry frozen yogurt with coconut and granola, mix well and destroy with chewing and loud happy noises. they even print out a little label for you to explain how good the treat in your hand is! how fair and unbias is that? so as we're walking back to the office, i shrewdly cast "sorry sucka" glances at starbucks and corner bakery for daring to not provide nutritional information on the sides of their wares.
"haha caramel frapuccino! you will not undo me today!"

but tomorrow? yes. we will meet up tomorrow.

***day passes in tastebud induced high***

now i'm not sure what exactly causes me to go into icicle mode in texas in the fall, but dangit it's here and i'm cold.
yes, i realize it was in the 70s yesterday.
yes, mom, i realize i could turn the heat on.
no grandma, i don't need thicker socks.

what i needed was to not be such a cheap jerk and just go and buy the electric blanket i had been talking about for, czech it, THREE YEARS. yes ladies and gentlemen, buyer's remorse is a terrible plague, and i wouldn't wish it on anyone. but the seduction of purchasing an item that has been off limits for so long brings it's own brand of excitement, which i'm sure the checkout lady at target did not appreciate.
"do you think they sell car chargers for this thing?" (i point at the blanket)
"you can swipe your card at anytime." (bratty 17 year old crapface points at card machine)
"ah. i'll just check somewhere else then." (i swipe card and look down, shamefaced.)

i spread the blanket on the bed and marvel at how awesome this is going to be. i remove socks, sweater, fleece sweater, hoodie, knit hat with flower, and prepare to be wowed.

it is now i realize it has to be plugged in. electricity wins again!

cut to me watching the hills while the blanket warms up. yes, i said the hills. it's my thing, let it go. audrina really thought l.c. would sleep with justin? well, maybe after he got his hair cut. haha she said "his impeccable hygiene".

when the time came to get under the covers, words cannot express the rapture i felt. i was warm, i was cocooned, i was nevereverever going to leave this bed. i told scott i was going to quit my job and sleep for a living and he gave me the same face and tone as the target lady. can't have that.

i have never slept so well in my entire life. except for when i woke up at 3am sweating and had to rocket the control down from 7. 7? did i really set it that high? god, i might have roasted! so a few words of advice if you're feeling blue:

orange cup. acai berry. coconut. optional granola.
heated blanket. between sheet and comforter. begin at a 5, but push it down when you're ready to sleep, lest your house smell like bacon in the morning.